I’m a person who has experienced a wide variety of changes. Sometimes more frequently than I think I can handle. Recently I experienced an unexpected change in my job. When it was gone, I was okay. The part that I was not okay with was the future I had dreamed that I will have with the career if I had stayed. This dream has made it difficult to fathom other lines of work and has also propelled me back into teaching yoga.
You see, every time I have attempted teaching yoga (twice) I have been held back by something. Fear. I enjoy teaching, so the scariest part for me has been the financial side. Not always knowing when you’ll get paid or if it will be what you expected. The corporate world provides stability, comfort and predictability. It’s safe.
So here I am contemplating the meaning of life for myself. Here is what I’ve found to be the key ingredients I’m seeking in my search:
When I am teaching yoga, helping and have the freedom and control to be authentic and real, without constraints of too many policies, regulations and schedules, I’m a pretty happy camper.
How do I achieve these elements? Letting go. That means, I set my intention to the universe, I search for what I want and I am willing to say no to the things that don’t align. Sounds simple enough? It’s hard. People will constantly tell you what you should do and having the discernment to know what’s best for you is really difficult.
During this transition, I turn to my yoga practice for solace. My breath will always be there to calm me. And when I’m on my mat I can prove my strength and accept my weaknesses. There is space. When I practice yoga I can experience all of the main ingredients that give me fulfillment and peace.
It takes effort to let go most of the time. But when I experience moments of clenching and clinging tightly, I am learning to observe. I’m learning to release. I can hold on to fear and anxiety or I can let those things go to make room for things that serve me. I’ll never be safe in the future or the past, but in the present moment, when I am fully awake and aware, that’s where I can find peace. And when I can’t find it, I can embrace the sound of my breath, calming me like an ocean, giving me the space to just be.