I feel like every time I blog about something I end up dishing out advice. Truth is, I’m not just preaching to you guys, but I’m preaching to myself.
I surround myself with positive people, quotes, reminders, and books so that I don’t get depressed and lose myself in my bad habits and negative thinking. I practice yoga for a gazillion reasons, but one of them being that it holds me together. Before yoga there was running, rock climbing, lacrosse, soccer, ballet… I’ve always had something that I practiced regularly to help keep me sane.
But what if everything I need to keep calm goes away? Just thinking about it raises my heart rate. At least I have my breath. What if everything hits at once? Job, family, relationship, car, weather… Okay, been there before. First I’ll probably cry. I might call my dad or best friend… and then eventually I’ll listen to my breath. I close my eyes and I picture a wave, rising and falling. I imagine myself riding the wave, feeling the water on my skin, and relaxing into the peaceful rhythm as the waves rock me back and forth. And I remember, everything is temporary. This feeling won’t last. My situation will change.
It’s funny how when things suck I desperately want change. But when things suddenly change, I freak out. I’ve been getting injured more often over the past couple of years, and it finally dawned on me that I’ve been pushing myself too hard. I physically go to my edge and beyond whenever I have the opportunity. And when I’m injured, it’s hard for me to accept that time, space and doing nothing are sometimes the best solution. Working with what I have is my yoga practice. Being honest with myself, learning to modify or take a break is all I can do. I don’t know when I will heal, but I can be open and expect good things.
Allowing life to happen, even in the ways we don’t want it to, is extremely challenging. It not only takes patience, but acceptance, and trust too. Sometimes I got it, sometimes I don’t. It’s a practice. I’m learning that life doesn’t have to make sense or give me a map for me to be able to accept it as is.
“I have come to accept the feeling of not knowing where I am going. And I have trained myself to love it. Because it is only when we are suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight, that we force our wings to unravel and alas begin our flight. And as we fly, we still may not know where we are going to. But the miracle is in the unfolding of the wings. You may not know where you’re going, but you know that so long as you spread your wings, the winds will carry you.” –C. Joybell C.
Adventures don’t always have a guide or an itinerary. My favorites have been when I was wandering around, open to whatever came next. Let’s be open to a new adventure this year and be grateful for the ones we’re on right now, however uncomfortable they may be.